The Nissan Micra has become such an integrated part of British culture, we’ve adopted it as ‘one of our own.’ Built at Nissan Sunderland since 1992, the cute supermini was the first Japanese car to win European COTY in 1993 with a focus on compactness, comfort, reliability and value for money. All of those traits still appear present and correct in the latest fourth generation Micra, but it now seems like it’s being exalted as some kind of hero to the bland.

The new Nissan Micra is uniformly competent but painfully featureless

Yes, you cannot question that the new Nissan Micra is cleaner and more fuel efficient and safer than the previous car, thanks to six airbags and a four star Euro NCAP rating. There’s more room in the back and the insurance group is lower, too. But in its application for 160 markets -- the Micra is being described as Nissan’s first ‘global car’ with production shifting to India, China and Thailand  -- this car has lost the 3dr model variant and some, no, most of its character, embracing mediocrity like it’s some kind of lifestyle choice. Unless you get excited by turning circles, that is -- 4.64m apparently. A Hackney Carriage does it in 8m.

That may be good enough for other car markets, but the UK is like bootcamp for the B-segment. With a £9k starter point, this car is pitching itself up against a fiercely competitive line-up that includes the Ford Fiesta, Fiat 500 and Hyundai i20.

Some cars behave like white goods. Their function is simple and clear cut, so it either does its job or doesn’t. The Nissan Micra is one of those cars. We know it will start, it will stop and odds are it will be reliable. At that very basic level, it will perform your tasks competently and dutifully. However, if you want a supermini with a bit of character, something that you can actually feel vaguely proud of or attached to, I’d be tempted to look elsewhere.

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